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What is surveyor?A Building surveyor is a necessary hindrance to the building of a home. They are pedantic sycophants without a shred of common sense, and are incapable of making a determination without covering there ass or referring it to a Structural Engineer. I thought my new home was infested with vermin, but it was even worse, a Building Surveyor was on site. surveyor - meme gifsurveyor - videoSurveyor - what is it?The most slimy, greedy, biggest con-merchant wankers in construction industry. Always altering/chopping and changing costs like an evil Sith Lord at the expense of poor white man subcontractor who is feeding his family on 12 pence per day. 'That Quantity Surveyor charged me ยฃ20,000 for a toilet seat and he's still holding money we were owed by the contractor 2 years ago - nobhead!' What does "surveyor" mean?A customer, generally in a supermarket who stares intently at the old LCD screens made by IBM. Their purpose is to find the slightest inconsistency with posted prices with what the item actually rings up. Obviously they have no problem with a item that rings up less than what was posted, but they become outraged at the fact that a particular item rang up 15ยข more. This intent staring leave them helpless and oblivious to the outside world. Such as, lets say at Wal-Mart (where the customers remove the bags from the carousel), they just let a pile of bags form before you have to specifically ask them to break their gaze and do something about it. Either that, or they brought a person shopping to help them in these helpless stages of shopping Cashier 1: Dude, why was that crazy bitch yelling at you? Surveyor - what does it mean?a carbonated beverage composed of two parts Sunkist and one part Mountain Dew. refreshingly delicious in the summertime. Surveyor 1: Lawsy me, I'm parched. Surveyor - meaningAn adorable man who thinks only with numbers but when conversing with women talks only with the language of love. If he were an animal he'd be a mule, i.e. he lives in a group but when his time has come he walks alone in the desert and accepts his fate. 'Hey John I saw Rusty the other day, he's a Quantity Surveyor'...gasping, John replies 'wow Pete, I hear they are phallic gods with the brain power of Stephen Hawking'...'too true John, I'd give my left nut-sack and an hour of cunnilingus with Thora Herd's (RIP) rotting corpse to be a Quantity Surveyor' Surveyor - definitionHe/she who surveys and quantifies materials and labor on civil engineering and construction contracts. Usually with no actual knowledge of engineering or construction practices. Surveyor - slangSurveyors are supposed to be reasonably intelligent people capable of using equipment to gather survey data (elevation, coordinates, etc.) for a specified area. In reality, they're the idiots who couldn't pass their engineering classes but didn't want to be English majors. They can take the most advanced surveying equipment that uses data from up to a dozen satellites at once and somehow can still end up with data that is 20 feet off and 100 feet below sea level. Also cannot tell the difference between a fire hydrant and a sidewalk or a building and a chain-link fence when it comes time to label their borderline unusable data. They, along with architects, are the bane of every civil engineer and CAD drafter's existence. Engineer: Did the surveyor give us any useful data this time? Surveyor1.A god like person that is infinitely more cunning than an engineer but unlike engineers actually have devoloped the socal skills of an 'A' list celib. The Surveyors surveyed that (whatever object you want) and made a 3D digital image of it. Thanks Survey!! |
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