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What is The Guillotine?
The act of squatting over one's anus and lowering your scrotum into the open orifice. Your partner then proceeds to clench their anus closed once the testicles are inserted. Thus, simulating the function of the well known, French guillotine. The anus is the "blade" and the semen is the "blood" after said "artificial execution".
"I was feeling a little historical last night, so I made my girlfriend give me the guillotine"
The Guillotine - video
The Guillotine - what is it?
v. to hide a boner putting your penis in the natural/straight-up position. The penis log is well hidden and unnoticed, but the head exceeds the part where your belt fits...if someone lifts your shirt, they'll see your head saying hi
i had to guillotine my penis so my teacher didn't notice my boner when he asked me to pass up to the blackoboard...
What does "The Guillotine" mean?
A beautiful device used to behead tens of thousands of revolutionary scum during the French Revolution and the reign of daddy Maxamilien Robespierre.
Wow, it's so great how our benevolent leader Robespierre is so selflessly cleansing France of the filthy counterrevolutionaries with his guillotine so we can live in the Republic of Virtue!
The Guillotine - what does it mean?
A submission often seen in no-gi bjj or MMA; also great for self-defence.
The rugby kid leg tackled me with his head down.... I just whipped in a guillotine and choked that jock out.
The Guillotine - meaning
a prank when you are over a friends house, and you call his girlfriend and tell her he wants a blowjob, then hide in the closet. when she is sucking his cock, you jump out of the closet naked and surprise her, causing her to bite down on your friend's dick.
wow that guillotine left a mark on my dick for months
The Guillotine - definition
Extreme woman muffin top that you need to lift up when you wanna engage in sexual intercourse with a ginormous rhino of a chick. When that muffin top flops back down after insertion, it basically does to your dick what a guillotine used to do to people's heads.
George: "whatsup dude how's your penis?"
Tom: "Not too good man, last night I fucked this bitch while I was really drunk and she definitely was packin the guillotine"
The Guillotine - slang
A sexual position involving two females and one male participant. The two females spread legs and meet vagina-to-vagina (also known as scissoring) and the male inserts his penis into the center; so named the guillotine because his 'head' gets cutoff by the scissors.
I lost my crucial head to a guillotine with two skeezers I took home from the bar last night.
The Guillotine
A 'practical joke' that involves lifting the seat of a toilet, and intricately defecating on the front lip of the bowl. You then delicately place the toilet seat on top on the freshly laid nugget, and evacuate the stall.
Ideally, your intended victim will come along to enjoy their peaceful abulution, drop their pants and proceed to sit down.
The result of their bodyweight on the toilet seat will sever a section of turd and eject it like Mary Antoinette's head into the victims awaiting pants.
Everything going to plan, you will have successfully shat in someone's pantaloons while they are wearing them. And probably irrevocably burned any bridges of friendship in the process.
Mark laid the guillotine in the camps mess toilet. Now they have taken all the seats away since we clearly can't be trusted.
The Guillotine
A very old French invention, typically with a large wooden frame, and a very sharp slate of metal attached to a rope. The person being executed is then laid down in position, the rope is pulled and they are decapitated.
"Today, at the hanging, we have two contraptions instead. An old-fashioned rope, and our new invention, the guillotine. It is swifter, and cleaner and has no chances of survival."
The Guillotine
When you French kiss your girl and uppercut her jaw
"Yo james I hit my girl with "The Guillotine"
"Oh shit yeah todd"