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What is Sarasota?
Sarasota is both a city and county in Florida. The city is well known for its high suicide rate. The county is unheard of. Sarasota's main export is talentless hacks. It imports tourists and fat people. When traveling in Sarasota, visiting the many tourist attractions, such as the beach and large assortment of retirement homes is encouraged. When residing in Sarasota, large doses of meth-amphetamine or knife stabs to one's own face should be administered in a healthy dosage.
Because Jim resides in Sarasota, he is doomed. He may as well get high. He's a failure anyway.
Sarasota - meme gif
Sarasota - video
Sarasota - what is it?
A city in SW Florida that is 50% elderly retirees, 25% black thugs, and 25% white trailer trash meth or heroin addicts. The blacks and dirty whites constantly try to kill themselves and each other off, while the old folks call 911 to complain about all the noise from the gunfire reaching their penthouse condo. Meanwhile, local police insist there is no crime here.
Straight outta Sarasota yo! Bang bang skeet skeet! Wanna get fcked up? Just do it quiet so granny don't complain!
What does "Sarasota" mean?
Where you go to let your soul die. Everyone knows everyone there is no secrets. Can’t find a real friend here for the life of you, oh and dating ? Forget about it. everyone just gets passed around like one giant incest pool. the police department all locals. just mad they weren’t popular in high school so they take it out on whoever they feel like. also if you’re even mildly of any color other than white you will feel like u never fit in no matter how many years you live here it is run by white prejudice people it is what it is. There is no growth opportunity here for a young adult whatsoever. Basically a giant white retirement home so if you like to have nothing to do on a Friday and constantly be talked about and backstabbed your whole life come on down.
Sarasota. Where u go to die. It’s cursed.
Sarasota - what does it mean?
"In the Sarasota area, you can enjoy the breathtaking sunsets, educational museums, operas, ballets, plays, golf tournaments, and boat races. " States Sarasota.com.
Hahahahahahahahaaha.
Sarasota: noun
hell,shithole,nothing of perticular interest, mid-western city located in Florida.
I suppose that your opinion of this "wonderous city" mostly depends on your age.
If you are in your mid-fiftys, and have well over a hundred grand in your account, you will do fine.You'll probably enjoy your stay, conversate with the tourists, and laugh behind their backs when they go back to their cottages buried in snow.
I'm personally not too fond of it. I enjoy an occasional seasonal change, and the sun DOES get old. Who ever said it has some of the most beautiful women was mostlikely making crystal meth in their laundry room. The attractions are not that great, or even much to look at. "Saint Armands Circle" is completely full of shit. The "unique" shops aren't anything you have haven't seen before, and it is much too time consuming to even bother going.
"Tommy Bahahma" is all you'll find.
God I love Sarasota.
person #1:"Mike and myself went to Sarasota over spring break."
person #2:"Excuse me while I go hang myself."
Sarasota - meaning
god's waiting room for old people
sarasota is a town where all the old people live and die
Sarasota - definition
Lifeless, overpriced beach town on the west Florida coast. Not very friendly, bad traffic, not much to do, terrible job market. Lots and lots and lots of old people. A dead-end feeling where the sense of futility and a vague depression are enhanced by constant sunshine and high humidity. Very nice beaches, though. A good place to relax for a few days if you like roasting in the sun. Don't move here.
Wow, that waitress just ripped us off, and we tipped her good, too. I've been Sarasota'd!!
Sarasota - slang
A coastal town in Florida. Lots of Rich and/or old people live there. Home of the Carlie Brucia kidnapping. Also home of the Ringling's home, Ringling art museum, Booker Elementary (The school where George W. Bush was at during 9/11),Cincinatti Reds spring training, and the former home of the ringling circus. Sarasota also has an international airport, and a pretty low crime rate. Overall a pretty nice place to live.
Sarasota is generally a nice place to live, except for the old people and snowbirds.
Sarasota
I should invest in a funeral home in Sarasota.
Sarasota
Hell’s waiting room. Voted best place to die, 2018. Voted Best place to retire during a global Pandemic, 2020 & 2021, consecutively. Upscale coastal South Florida Gulf resort town tethered to its past glory as the home of the freak Ringling Brothers Circus. Populated by wealthy retirees, snowbirds, and witness protection clients. Visitors notoriously have no access to the internet. They must rely on interrupting local residents as if they were staff in an all-inclusive resort.
Zero local economy or unique character outside of Siesta Key Beach. Substandard medical infrastructure. Beach is frequently named America’s top destination within a 3 year time period. Parking is impossible when the heat index is below 110°F.
Shopping is the main activity aside from the beach. Retail consists of the usual national chains, big malls, Tommy Bahamaesque haberdasheries, and Chinese-imported seashell-laden tchotchke shops. Approximately four restaurants have kitchens that are open past 9pm.
Once known for an inexplicably giant statue of a sailor kissing a nurse on VJ Day, the piece was relocated to make way for a trendy 19-way roundabout at the city’s waterfront.
The city’s future looks bright though, as two hotels have been approved for construction on Siesta Key. This has inflamed the relationship between Island residents and the city though, because improving the single tourist attraction for the entire county seems anathema to those who reside near said beach.
After his divorce, we never heard from him again. He was last seen in Sarasota working one of those metal-detector things on #siestakeybeach trying to make rent money.
Sarasota
The most boring place in the world for the young, fabulous, and broke. For anyone who doesn't live here, I'm sure that Sarasota seems like a beautiful and wonderful place to vacation. But living here sucks. Basically, this is where rich, snotty old farts come to die. And irritate the hell out of the locals.
On any given day, you can see the blond, rich, family of four that just moved here from Michigan, ruining the sunset on Siesta Key, to take a family portrait in their "Floridian" white shirts and khaki pants. Shopping is a hobby, because there is nothing else to do. And, the shopping malls, now owned by the Texas-based Westfield, are now overrun by bored-out-of-their-minds preteens with Daddy's credit cards in their hot little hands. Buisnesses that have thrived here for 30-plus years are being driven out by greedy speculators. Every other home is for sale, with no one buying them, because the real estate bubble burst. I guess millionares don't feel like purchasing a home on Siesta Key, where driving one block on Memorial Day weekend takes four hours, and you are more likely to have your homeowners insurance taken away than a dog getting fleas. Then, once you're done playing the "hunker-down" drinking game during the latest hurricane, you can go to Walmart for the sixth time this week. The best thing about Sarasota is that is easy to spot tourists. Tourists, if you're at the beach, are the ones who bring two giant coolers, a giant bag of sandcastle building tools, a huge umbrella or tent, and about ten bottles of suntan lotion. And they do this to be at the beach for an hour. Outside of Siesta, they're the ones yelling at waitresses, cashiers, and just about everyone else in the service industry. Then they drive 30 miles an hour on US-41, and call it Tamiami Trail, to go for ice cream on St. Armands circle. They take pictures of the "art" that blocks the view of Marina Jack, without realising that the boats anchored in the bay are inhabited by people whom are considered homeless. Sarasota is the most segregated county in all of Florida, and the city planners are trying desperately to push out anyone who doesn't make at least 100K a year. But then again, they are too busy designing parking lots that are only easily navigated by the secret service.