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What is processed meat?
The act of masturbating, but instead of already being horny and just feeling like a wank, you have to touch yourself a lot just to achieve a boner. Thus, the achievement of an erection and subsequent ejaculation is wholly manufactured and processed, unlike the natural, and far more common "horny wank", customarily used to alleviate "blue balls". This processed meat is often called a "cold wank".
Dude A: I was so bored last night, I had some processed meat.
Dude B: Ah man, unlucky.
processed meat - video
Processed meat - what is it?
Oral gratification of a man's genitalia. Getting Head. Receiving a blowjob.
I was in the back room gettin some processed meat by this one bitch.
She's hella good, she'll process yo meat my nigguh.