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What is Swimming?
A series of unfortunate events.
"Cancel my evening plans. I am going swimming and won't be capable to do anything afterwards."
"What a series of unfortunate events."
Swimming - meme gif
Swimming - video
Swimming - what is it?
Swimming is another word for a "buzz" mainly off of nicotine. When you're sitting in class and the teacher isn't paying attention so you let your friend hit your juul (or other vaping device) until they can't feel their legs.
Darren: Hey Logan can I hit the juul?
Logan: Wait until Mr smith sits down
*hits Juul*
Logan: how ya feeling?
Darren: I'm swimming dude
What does "Swimming" mean?
A living hell. A great sport to do if you want to be yelled at for breathing. Gets very boring.
Let's go swimming at the pool!
Swimming - what does it mean?
1) A way to prevent yourself from drowning, at least until the shark gets you.
2) A sport that gets guys ripped, girls fit, and both tan, it's the sexiest sport around. In addition, it's really easy to use as a metaphor for sex. Downsides: looking great, having too many people want to screw you, too loud of a crowd, all the groupies... Real Downsides: If you're a guy, it looks almost as gay as water polo. Try not to get an erection the speedo doesn't really hide much, including how big you are... You have to be in the water by 5 a.m. during season. Like drowning, it takes a LOT of energy. If you don't use lotion, you will get sunburned until you get tanned, also you might have cancer. It damages your hair, which oddly enough makes it look thick and awesome and sunbleached for guys, but girls might not like what happens to them. Unless you lose yourself, it can be really really boring because you just go there and back again, the trick is losing yourself in other stuff, not thinking, or thinking about how the water feels and if your stroke can be improved. This is similar to what you do in other sports, which are after all basically moving from point to point; what matters in any sport is not what you're doing, it's how you do it.
3) One of the only two sports that get girls wet and half-naked.
1) {Theme music from Jaws can be heard, a buoy bobs in center-field.}
{enter head surrounded by white splashes} "This is the second to last buoy! One more and I can go home knowing I've strengthened my body and helped myself live a few more years," thinks the swimmer.
{Enter a grey fin cutting through the water behind the swimmer} "I sense a disturbance in the Force!" the shark metaphorically thinks, "I must devour the delicious seal and maintain the balance of nature!" {Chomp. Blood. Foam.} "FUCK!" screams the swimmer, "THE FUCKING SHARK BIT OFF MY LEGS! FUCK YOU NATURE!" {drowns}
"Damn that seal tasted fucking disgusting, too much irony methinks." the shark thinks.
2) {The setting is a pool surrounded by greyish concrete, inside is around a hundred swimmers, going back and forth, back and forth, mindlessly, while a coach sits there, bored but alert.} "Damn this shit is getting old, it's all the same: back and forth, do those fucking flip turns at each end which gets water in my goggles and up my nose. Swerve into the lane-lines on backstroke, hit other people with butterfly, barely move with breaststroke, and be held back by the lazy assholes in front of me when I do freestyle," one thinks to himself, "But hey, look, I'm ripped and tan and I have pretty awesome hair {admires self}. And by Damn are those chicks hot, all tan and wet and... DAMN!"
3) Go to a pool when people are swimming or playing water polo, as long as there are girls. Sit, watch, take pictures.
Swimming - meaning
Constantly on the verge of being broke.
I can't imagine renting an apartment in Seattle and not swimming.
Swimming - definition
Swimming is a water sport that is incredibly good for you, and you will most likely become buff if you are a male. (Experience: I am a swimmer) Swimming is a very demanding sport that generally requires 5-6 days of afternoon training per week, and sometimes you will have morning practices as well/instead.
Swimming is one of the best sports for you because you can do it till you are almost dead.
Swimming - slang
The best sport ever.
People say it's easy, but It's not.
It is one of the hardest sports, do you know how many muscles you use?
Most swimmers hate soccer, and they say
'If swimming were any easier, It would be called soccer'
It's very hard and you have to push yourself to the max.
Meets make you exhausted for the rest of the way.
"Practice was so hard today."
"I know, those 200 flys were torture."
"Every practice is torture, why do we even swim?"
"Cause we love it!"
"Yeah, swimming amazing."
Swimming
A sport often neglected by those who have not been a part of, nor swam at least 40 lengths of the pool non-stop. Swimming is a very intense sport full of speedos and half naked girls whom join either to stay in shape, competitively swim, or for the lack of clothing that the men wear.
Often Rejected by muscle-heads such as football players, runners, wresters and any type of other sport that requires injury to the head because there is no more room for acceptance due to the lack of space available in their brains for acceptance.
Swimmers are part of a team which they refer to as their family, as they are together 24/7 due to the amount of practice that swim coach piles upon them. Swimmers also are known to date the members of their swim team; which is technically incest.
Swimming teams often complain about their sport, yet never quit because of the love/hate relationship with the water. Also, a swimmer can be found by food, talking about food, or complaining that there is not enough food.
Football player: swimming's easy.
Swimmer 1: if swimming's easy then why am I skinny and in shape while you're still fat?
Swimmer 2: (to other swimmer) bro, eat this sandwich, you're not you when you're hungry.
Swimming
Most physically and mentally demanding sport on the planet. If you disagree, you are obviously one of the many who aren't tough, determined or skilled enough to be a swimmer.
Gives you massive shoulders + chest and a toned upper body. Great for your lungs and heart.
'Oh my god, who is that guy with the amazing body?'
'I dont know, but he is a swimmer for sure!'
'The others look so weedy in comparison to him with thier narrow shoulders and lack of 6-pacs. Why doesnt everyone do swimming?'
'Because the training is so intense and demanding, most people would die after about 3 minutes!'
Swimming
The most beast sport out there. Swimmers get no time outs, no substitutions, and no water breaks. We train twice a day and have already put in a good 2 hours before you lazy soccer players hall your fat butts out of bed. Swimmers- six packs, chlorine addicted people that admit that they have no life, but at least they don't go running after balls all day like soccer players.
Hey wanna hang out?
No I have to go swimming