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What is Asian parents?
The kind of parents where if you get 19/20 they would spank your ass so hard you would spill blood. So if the kid get 0/20, there would literally be mass murder from the parents.
Jeff: (oh hell no, help me jesus) Uhm... I got 0/20...
Asian parents: It's okay sweetheart, we're just gonna prepare the nuke and all of our guns. And use it, on you.
God: okay that's enough bullshit I'm taking the child
Asian parents - video
Asian parents - what is it?
fuckers thats what the hell these assfucks are, they are ugly ass looking bitches. these assholes bitch slap you and are cheap and if you don't get an A you get beaten up for 1 week straight.
asian kid: I wanted to buy MY BIRTHDAY present, why won't you let me?
Asian parents: fuck you wasting your damn money like that go kill yourself.
white guy: hey is getting your ass whooped 1 week straight a record?
asian kid: hell no man it's like this every damn day.
What does "Asian parents" mean?
Most Asian parents rule over their children with a harsh belief: education dominates everything. They will push aside your social life and get rid of your emotions if it means getting straight A's. Asian parents will think of the worst possible scenario and determine what to do based on it. Here's what to expect if you live in an Asian household.....
*Rice, rice, and more rice
*Nothing but water
*Education > life itself
*A - the only acceptable grade
B - they will scream and hit you
C - they will seriously abuse you and hurt you bad
D or lower - kicked out or threatened to death
*They don't care for your looks, all they want is short hair
*No boyfriends/girlfriends
*Will not let you go out late
*9 PM - 10 PM bedtime
*They will make you study no matter what
All in all, they are just trying to protect and raise you, believe it or not. Don't blame the parents, blame the way they were raised. I'm Asian and I remained sane due to pure determination. The only thing you can do is put up with it. You can't change them, it's just the way it is. You'll just have to see that they want you to be successful. While it might be cruel, it's what they believe is the best way to make you a successful person. You will want to hate them a lot, but keep your head up high and you'll make it.
Typical Asian parents.....
Dad: GO STUDY NOW!!!
Me: Wait, what did I do?
Dad: GO OR GET OUT!!!
Me: Alright, I'll go study.
Dad: DON'T TALK BACK!!!
Mom: GO GET A HAIRCUT!!!
Me: What? Why? It's not that long
Mom: DON'T TALK BACK TO ME!!!
*drags you off to get a bowl cut or a buzz cut
Asian parents - what does it mean?
Parents whose tyranny compels you to define them in the virtual world because they define you in the real world.
Asian Parents: "WTF is Pomona? Go Berkeley!"
Asian parents - meaning
The type of parents who will literally punish you to death if it means coming home without an A grade or better.
Expect little to no allowance as they are literally fucktards who just wanna save every single cent and not let their kids indulge in anything.
Expects you to go to some ivy league school and forces you to study till your brains go bonkers.
Expects you to get married as soon as you hit your late 20s and will nag at you until you are deaf.
They don't realise how much times have changed and it's no longer the traditional upbringing that makes someone do well in society. Why based a child's worth on how many achievements he's got? That's like raising a kid and then expect him to repay you with triple or double the amount.
Funny incident:
I was at one of my best bud's house at one time and he got yelled at for being a moron since he hasn't cleaned up his room. He then replies since it would be messy again then why bother cleaning it. He got grounded apparently. As of currently, he has moved out and stayed with a couple of friends here and there. He told me he has never feel so much happier instead of the constant berating and getting fucked by his parents for trivial issues such as grades,haircut,what time he has to go home,etc. The list goes on. He has moved out so yeah.
Asian parents are such a pain in the neck.
Asian parents - definition
A type of parent who makes you do homeworks during a summer vacation, no any kind of day off. Even if you don't have any kind of school assignments or you are already done with it, they will ASSIGN YOU WITH SOME BOOK REPORTS LIKE THEY EVEN KNOW WHAT YOU ARE TALKING ABOUT. THEY ALSO WANT YOU TO BE EITHER A :
1.DOCTOR
2.LAWYER
3.DOCTOR
4.DENTIST
5.DOCTOR
6.TEACHER
7.DOCTOR
8.PIANIST
9.DOCTOR
10. ANYTHING BUT A RESTAURANT EMPLOYEE OR A SANITATION WORKER
WARNING!!!!! DON'T EVER SAY YOU HAVE NOTHING TO DO. YOU'LL THANK ME LATER
My asian parents (mom) assigned me a book report during a summer break because I said I was done with my school work. I just copied the ones I did for school into the notebooks. Like she'll even know what the books are about.
Asian parents - slang
Asian parents.... they seem like any other type of parents... don't they? Well, I guess you're wrong. These are the people that start getting a whole load of us Asian kids upset. Here are some things that happened to me:
1. Not letting their kids play real sport, like rugby union, claming that it will affect their studies and it's too dangerous. Eventually, they'll let you play... but you gotta wait forever.
2. If you don't get good grades, you're screwed. They'll hit you and kill you until you promise to study harder for the next exam.
3. They don't care about your physical health and social life, they just care about your studies.
4. They want you to be a doctor/dentist. No way...
5. They want the best school for you... no matter if it's 2 hours away.
6. You got all A's and just one F in your report card. They'll kill you and belt you for that F.
7. Your parents see a girl hug you at the age of 16. They belt you because the girl hugged you.
8. You play games for over one hour. Asian parents will kill you for it.
9. Got into a sporting gala day? Asian parents wont let you go because they're worried about you missing out on a day of school. Gosh damn, it's only ONE DAY!
10. Every evening it's rice, rice, rice and more rice.
11. "Don't watch MTV, study! You're wasting your time on watching uselsss music videos!" says Asian parents.
These are just 11 of thousands of wrong things that Asian parents do to you. From this, it is sensible to infer that a majority of Asian parents are just dickwads.
I got 97% in my test, my Asian parents are going to kill me. - Typical Asian kid
I got a Satisfactory in my report... I'm dead. - Typical Asian kid dictated by Asian parents
Fuck! I'm into summer school, when did I even register? - Asian kid
Asian parents
The main cause of dispair in most asian teenagers' lives. Here are some major characteristics of asian parents:
1. They still enforce a FUCKING BED TIME for their children, even if they are in high school.
2. They almost never give their children money.
3. Whenever their kid gets a gift or money from someone else, the parents usually gives them to someone else.
4. The only hairstyles allowed for their children are bowl cut and buzz cut.
5. They force their children to do work and chores all day when they just watch asian movie series all day long.
6. The mom often bitch slaps her child when the child did something wrong" ie. spilled a couple of drops of milk on the floor. The dad punches/whacks/shoves intowall until the child starts crying for similar "offenses".
7. Anything lower than an A is considered a failure. If an asian child gets a B or something, he/she expects a beating at home.
8. There is no such thing as a good grade in an asian home.
9. Typical home made asian cuisine is rice, fish, chicken, and vegetables. Except that they are all poorly cooked and taste worse than partially digested milk.
10. If a male asian teenager's parents see him so much as TALKING with a girl, they will accuse him of having sex with her even if he was merely asking her for something like homework.
11. Asian parents often treat their children like they are 5 years old and claim that they do so because they "care" about their children.
12. They usually speak in Engrish.
Examples of asian parents:
1. Dad can I go watch a movie with my friend? It's saturday.
No! It already 10:30! Get to bed NOW!!!
2. Mom can I have $2 for lunch today?
No go earning it yourself.
3. Mom why did you give my gift card away to some random asian dude?
Because you don't are needing it.
4. Dad: I give you haircut now!
Kid: But my hair isn't even long.
Dad: I don't care! You look like girl! Come over here before I take away you TV and compute privalwoeigb *privaleges*awoiwebgio(word to complicated to process)
5. Dad can I go outside for a while? I just finished a whole SAT.
No! Go do another!
6. Self explanatory
7. Kid: Oh fuck I just got an 88 on my math test.
Friend: You're fucked when you get home...
8. Mom can I go hang out with my friends I just got a 100 on my math test!
Why you no get extra credit? Stay home and study so you get extra credit next test.
9. Self explanatory
10. Mom: Who you talking to on phone?
Kid: Nobody
Mom: Let me listen *snatches phone*
Mom: *in phone* HARRO? WHO THIS?
Girl: Ummm... hi
Mom: *hangs up* Why you talk with girl? You get in bed with her?
11. Dad can you please stop peaking into my room?
No. I have to make sure you no using drug or do illegal things.
12.
Put some suntan rotion on you skin so you no get skin cansa!
You must show me compute history every day so i making sure you no looking at irregal web site!
Why you no get 100? When I little kiddie I arways get perfecting test score with extra credit addeding to score!
I hate you! You no never behaving, always thinking about play. Arr you thinks about are eat, sreep, game. Why cannot you act rike the perfected kid that I wanting you to be? You just an razy stupiding kid who cannotingedry act applopliatery and you justing never not no study!!!
Asian parents
They are Mostly toxic and are witches,
They try to change what you said in the past slightly so you don't notice and put different words in your mouth...
For example (Whoever person:i may come back home at 7 PM) (the parent when you didn't exactly come home at 7PM:YOU SAID YOU WILL COME BACK AT 7 PM)
see... they do asshole things like this.....
Also they expect the father to give the wife money all the time and none for himself, and most mothers waste it at gambling or buying stuff they don't need
Also most Asian parents are smart but messed up in the head and are crazy...
most of they have certain things that "Trigger" them, For example disagreeing with them.
When they trigger WATCH OUT! they go super crazy and will throw anything near them at you and bull charge you
(For example they will throw a cement saw if one is near them)
they will only stop if you force them too but be carfull not to give them bruises.... if you do they will show it off at work or something and make you look like a crazy asshole...
That reminds me! 98% of Asian parents are hypocrites.....
For example (You: Imagine you play games 3 hours a day) (Asian parents:STOP PLAYING GAMES ALL DAY) now you may think this is normal but in most cases when an Asian parents say that they are mostly "Watching TV all day and just sleeping "......
Also Asian parents are crazy and if they say "PRACTICE PIANO" you have to do it and get good at it..
also most of them are manipulative son of a bitches...
Most Asian Parents are toxic hateful witches
Asian parents
Parents that are horrible for the following reasons...
1. They will make you do unnecessary work from school, such as next week's homework, or if you have none, they make you read your textbook.
2. If you are ever caught with a person of the opposite gender, they will beat you and assume you fucked them.
3. They will beat you for random reasons, and since they are asian, they know kung fu and will beat your ass.
4. Any grade below a 90 is considered failing, even if you have 89.4.
5. Once you're in High school, presents for your birthday and Christmas will stop coming. Or if the gifts do come, they will be in the form of programs or books on the SAT's or school subjects.
6. Your hair cannot be longer than 1 inch if your a male.
7. Playing video games is not allowed on weekdays, and only like 1-2 hours on weekends.
8. To buy something, it must be on sale.
9. Going out with friends is a no no.
10. Your food with always have rice in it.
11. You will be expected to become a doctor or something similar.
12. Talking against your parents will be punished.
13. You never get any money, and if you do get some, then it goes right into your "college" fund.
14. Anything over $10 will not be bought for you.
15. They will always have poor grammar. No matter how much they've been in the U.S.
16. They will reinforce math and science like crazy.
Asian parents: You get B+...be prepare to die...
Me: Oh god....
On christmas morning
*opens presents*
Damn it...another math book.
Parent: Why your hair so long? And was that girl with you???
Me: I like my hair like this. And yes, that was a girl.
Parent: HEY! You talk back and you with girl, you gonna get hurt....