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What is pseudo-intellectual?
Most accurately defined in I Hope They Serve Beer in Hell by Tucker max:
"{A pseudo-intellectual typically has}horn-rimmed glasses, drinks Pinot Grigio by the glass at bars, buys poetry books but never reads them, avoids red meat, shops at the Kiehls counter, acts indignantly offended by Howard Stern,{and}likes to drop names like 'Foucault' and 'Sartre' in normal conversation."
These individuals, typically between 17 and 35 in age, can generally be found in the local coffee shop or art gallery and become very prevalent near the coastlines. However, the most common breeding grounds for pseudo-intellectuals are college campuses, with special emphasis on the Ivies, the Ivy equivalents, and tiny-ass liberal arts colleges.
Further characteristics of a pseudo intellectual include:
-ordering appletinis by the glass and requesting that they be "heavy on the apple and light on the 'tini."
-Rolling their own cigarettes (if they smoke).
-Railing on smokers for polluting the environment (if they don't smoke).
-Driving a small-ass hybrid, eating dolphin safe tuna, and criticizing those who pollute despite the fact that their Clinique makeup (if they are girls)was tested on defenseless animals and poor kids in Nepal.
-Acting "eccentric" to differentiate themselves from the masses as to seem unique, even though their kind are quite common.
-Consistently criticizing America and its citizens for no good reason, followed by the claim that they will move to Paris after they graduate from college in order to escape American "hypocrisy" and "naivete" in pursuit of a "higher culture." I didn't know high culture was defined as the act of running to America when in need then returning the favor by bitching out and waiving the white flag when America needed help (yeah, I'm talking about France).
-being nonconformists for the sake of nonconformity. The problem here is that by not conforming, they are actually conforming to the nonconformist movement and, thus, are still conformists. The majority will just respond by calling you "domesticated and uncultured" while the few honest ones will realize the error of their ways and immediately kill themselves to rectify the situation (but much to my dismay, this rarely happens).
-Having extremely bizarre statuses and/or information in their facebook profiles.
-being "liberal" solely for the sake of being liberal. Ask them what liberalism is and they will provide you with some nonsensical prattle about how you are not "enlightened" enough to understand their supposedly superior logic.
-watching or claiming to watch and enjoy French movies that no one has ever heard of. They also read similar books and will willingly criticize you for reading good fiction books like Harry Potter or reading any form of nonfiction.
-Liking Che Guevara yet knowing absolutely nothing about him or what he did. This trait is shared by wannabe Rastas as well.
Bastions of pseudo-intellectualism:
-Columbia University
-Harvard University
-Davidson College
-Carleton College
-UChicago
-Every high ranking liberal arts school
-Any school with a strong art or environmental studies program.
Douglas: This girl in my biology class about how great this new french movie called "L'SurrenderMonkey" was. When I asked her if she saw "Taken," she stated that she "finds American cinema to be far too bland, as the characters typically lack emotional complexity and generally never experience a cathartic moment of transcendence."
Zach: Fucking pseudo-intellectual. How did you respond?
Douglas: With 30 seconds of dumbstruck staring....then I proceeded to powder the pimp hand and slap her multiple times across the face.
pseudo-intellectual - meme gif
pseudo-intellectual - video
Pseudo-intellectual - what is it?
Gucci-glasses wearing pricks who think they are smart.
English Literature Professor: So let's discuss Henry the Fifth.
Pseudo-Intellectual: Well much more evidence has come about showing that Shakespeare was gay.
Is that all you are capable of adding to the conversation? We are talking about the story of a King of England, his personal and political turmoils, war, written by the Bard, and you think it's even relevant that maybe the Bard smoked a little pole? Who the fuck cares! Sucking cock doesn't make you legitimate. Being fucking awesome does. Stop seeking legitimacy by saying fucking awesome person X was gay. Just because your dad hated you and rejected you, don't try to refute that by being all "well the Bard sucked cock and he wrote significant works of art".
Go out and do something with your life, and stop wasting my time.
What does "pseudo-intellectual" mean?
the act of going to a coffeeshop with an impressive book (Debord, Nietzche, or maybe an advance bio book) and flipping through the pages without comprehension in hopes of starting a conversation with another patron.
Man that guy was going so pseudo-intellectual at the hungarian pastry shop.
Pseudo-intellectual - what does it mean?
the person above me^^^^
Pseudo-intellectual - meaning
Refers to two types of individuals:
1) Someone who lacks knowledge, but who tries to compensate by pretending to be very smart, by carrying around impressive looking books on science, math, literature, and related subjects. May also wear a trendy, sophisticated pair of eyeglasses.
For the most part, this type is harmless.
2) Someone who has a serious personality disorder. These types derive a great deal of pleasure by "enlightening" others with their "brilliance" and "wit".
Their primary method of operation is to use irony and sarcasm to taunt those who they believe do not live up to their standards. Virtually every word out of their mouth is some unnecessary, smartass remark.
They lack the ability to have a genuine, sincere conversation with anyone. Instead of having a healthy, balanced, back-and-forth exchange, they pontificate and talk down to those who have the misfortune of not escaping the room before they walk in.
It is a waste of time to point out to these disturbed individuals that their behavior is obnoxious, as they will inform you that you simply lack the ability to understand their "superior" view of the world.
Basically, it's someone who thinks that being an argumentative wiseass somehow makes them cultured and fun to be around, and that shouting at the rain and being disagreeable for the sake of being disagreeable somehow makes them substantive.
Me: "I think I'd like some barbecue sauce with my chicken nuggets."
Pseudo-intellectual: "What part of the chicken does the nugget come from, and are the chickens free range, and is the barbecue sauce the same red color as the blood that runs through the streets of Baghdad because of the evil American capitalism and imperialism that empowers greedy coporations such as McDonald's to exist?!"
Me: "Shut up, you delusional pseudo-intellectual."
Pseudo-intellectual - definition
Someone who pursues knowledge in a variety of categories for purely social reasons and tends to have only a basic understanding of many concepts.
The pseudo-intellectual doesn't seek knowledge for the purpose of better understanding the world, but rather to enhance their image. They also prefer to interpret concepts in a way that allows them to use their knowledge as a weapon in social scenarios. They'll use the misinterpretation of facts to appear objective and correct, and thus unaccountable, when "talking shit" on another person.
The pseudo-intellectual will challenge opinions or views as a way of making a personal attack. They then usually assume an imagined victory and will feel that the one they've attacked has been "put in their place". Pseudo-intellectuals are very catty and have a strong desire to socially dominate others.
Pseudo-intellectuals are quick to judge others and are usually very sure of their superiority based on their ability to use knowledge as social ammo. They'll use any means available to prove themselves "correct" and tend to believe that being correct gives them a blank check for any social pursuits, including ones that are undertaken purely for self gratification.
Given their usual motivation to either impress or dominate their peers, the Pseudo-intellectual is completely uninterested in any knowledge that they can't use in this capacity.
"I wish that pseudo-intellectual cunt-punt would shut the hell up! He's only going after that chick's interpretation of the movie because she refused to sleep with him."
Pseudo-intellectual - slang
1. One who attempts to flex intellect that does not exist within his or her own mind.
2. Can probably be found with a thesaurus in hand, while in a chat room, looking up new insults that are synonymous with "stupid" in order to boost his or her own undeserved ego.
3. Typical cases of pseudo-intellectualism involve pre-pubescent 15 year olds that think they have everything figured out, including, but not limited to: life, religion, politics, education, and sex. Ironically, they have never quite experienced either of the aforementioned.
4. Pretends he or she has an opinion.
5. Posseses a severe tendency to blindly and wholeheartedly believe any bullshit they hear, only to subsequently regurgitate the misinformation to anyone they see in an asinine attempt to appear more intelligent than a used, broken condom.
6. Should the victim of the verbal onslaught happen to have a differing opinion, the pseudo-intellectual will revert to his or her thesaurus and insult the opposition with words he or she never knew existed, and probably cannot even pronounce.
7. Annoyingly and constantly refers to the word antidisestablishmentarianism, as if knowledge of said word defined his or her illegitimately high intelligence quotient.
8. Typically a hypocrite; creates many, many contradictions. Most online grammar/spelling Nazis can relate.
9. Always ends a bullshit "argument" with, "I win, so stfu." Win what, dipshits? Your opinions weren't fact in the first place.
<Pseudo-Intellectual> Omg. You are Stupid. You are an idiot for not agreeing with everything I say. I know I'm right, even though I know nothing about the subject, because my friend knows someone that read someone's blog somewhere that mentioned something about it. I win, so stfu, you unintelligent moron. God, your stupid. You're such a stupid idiot. Antidisestablishmentarianism.
Pseudo-intellectual
4 signs of the pseudo-intellectual
1. Quoting
2. Going against common thought without evidence
3. Bringing up intellectualism in non-requistite situations
4. Un-neccersary use of verbs and adjectives with 4 syllables or more
Dude #1: hey wanna go to the movies tomorrow night?
Dude #2: Nah, the cinema is so low-brow. I don't understand how so many people find aesthetic values in it. I'm going home to read. As Descartes said "cogito, ergo sum".
Dude #1: Yeah....OK.
Pseudo-intellectual
Someone who pretends to be more intelligent than they are.
A hipster is a prime example of a pseudo-intellectual.
Pseudo-intellectual
a person who spends more time trying to look intelligent than actually being intelligent.
pseudo-intellectual: hey, check out this self-contained underwater breathing apparatus.
you: you mean that SCUBA gear?
psuedo-intellectual: yeah, that.