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What is pinch and zoom?
When you take a shit of catastrophic proportions (clog the john, splash the walls, destroy the ozone, etc.) at a public place (friend's house, mother-in-law, church, etc.) and you have to make a hasty getaway before anyone calls you out.
I was at my boss' house last night and I had a bad case of diarrhea so i just had to Pinch and Zoom.