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What is guido?
To sum it up, one could say it's the crossbreed between a "douchebag" and a "metrosexual".
Lisa - "Hey do you see that eurotrash pretty boy with the tight abercrombie shirt, spiked hair, and waxed eyebrows?"
Tina - "Yeah I thought he was gay, but then I realized he and his buddies had shitty macho boy attitudes. What a bunch of total douchebags."
Lisa - "No just a guido. The big muscles are supposed to make up for their small penis. I bet the one in the wifebeater isn't even Italian"
guido - meme gif
guido - video
Guido - what is it?
1. an insult to anybody who is actually Italian.
2. over tanned, hair crazed, big chested morons who drive shitty cars with rims that cost more than the car does.
3. Dress like complete jerk offs in a vain attempt to look cool and still go to clubs long after they should.
Guido: Hey, look at me, I'm Italian!!
Real Italian: Shut the hell up, you wannabe. (Proceeds to beat the piss out of loud mouth Guido wih baseball bat).
What does "guido" mean?
fake tanned
wear fake huge chains
embarrasment 2 italians
use hairgel like its water
have tapeups
wear colored contacts
invade clubs and mallsespecially diesel stores or armani exchange
pimp out there honda accords or jettas
blast techno music
OHH YEAHH && WHY DO GUIDOS ALWAYZ TEND 2 POSE EITHER WITH THEIR LIPS PUCKEREDwhich is rather gay OR THEY HAVE THEIR CHIN UP AS IF THEY ARE GOIN TO MESS U UP?
WE NEED 2 STOP THE PLAGUE OF GUIDOS WE MUST TRY AND WIPE THIS GROUP OUT
THEY NUMBER OF THEM ARE GROWING DAILY
THEY ARE INVADINGGG esPECIALLY MALLS
Omg i think i am getting guido-aphobic in this frickin mall
Guido - what does it mean?
a guido is simply just a douchebag
About 5 guidos at the club tried to get me to sleep with them last night. What douches.
Guido - meaning
1) a superficial American male, usually from the Tri-State area, pretending to be of Italian descent through the use of some limited slang in whatever dialect was spoken by his supposed ancestors from il Belpaese. Known for his bad music taste, the guido loves greasy hair, wifebeaters, bling bling, tracksuits, and intercourse with guidettes.
2) the guido style is also spotted in the Italian peninsula, particularly amongst wannabe gangsters of the camorra. Their trademarks in Italy are: wifebeaters, tracksuits, cars with strobo lights, a bad command of Italian, being overweight, fur anoraks and - above all - an unhidden love of Gigi D'Alessio's music.
3) a derogatory term for an Italian. For someone who actually is from Italy, being associated with American guidos is one of the worst possible offences.
'That guy must've spent all his money on pimping that piece of trash!'
'That should come to you as no surprise: he's a guido!'
'Are you sure this is Naples? There are so many guidos around it feels like Jersey!'
'Hey dude, in the US we call Italians "guidos".'
'In Italy we call Americans who call us guidos "rednecks".'
Guido - definition
cologne reeking, structure wearing, too much gel motherfucker that'll hit on your girlfriend while you're standing right there. he will also start talking to a girl you're talking to like you ane't there- usually has to little fag friends to back is pussy ass up incase you retaliate. he is not necessarily italian as the name might suggest.
i just met this hottie, then some guido steps in and cock blocks
Guido - slang
an italian who is culturally challenged and makes us real italians look bad.
Hey did you guys hear, Kim Cignarella is going out with some guido from Fairfield, what doosh bags.
Guido
Guidos are easily recognizable by their dark hair, overly tanned skin, thick accents & waxed eyebrows. The guido travels in packs, especially when heading to clubs to meet up w/ their deejay friends. Almost all guidos are self-proclaimed "deejays." They blast extremely loud music, usually some form of house, while they drive excessively fast.
If not at the club, the guido can be found at the gym, spending endless hours exercising and flexing in front the mirror. Though not all guidos use steroids, most do. Since most of their time is spent on their appearance and "physique," the guido typically is incapable of having a real career, but would rather work in a field of construction, telemarketing, or sales.
Even in the winter, the guido can wear a wifebeater & ripped jeans, after all he needs to show off his year long tan. Common guido attire includes tight shirts, Ed Hardy, Affliction, A|X, or any other"label" that is deemed trendy at the time. There is also the possibility that the guido will be wearing NO shirt at all while fist pumping and sticking his chest out.
Guidos have no respect for women and have no problem cheating. They also have a weakness for drugs & alcohol. They find nothing wrong with partying regularly & "clubbing" well into their 30's. Pictures of his club experiences & "deejay friends" will be all over his facebook page, but the numbers will pale in comparison to all of the photos of himself that he takes in the mirror.
"If I see one more guido loser post a picture of himself with his shirt off, I swear to god, I'm deleting my facebook page forever!!"
"Dude. It's midnight! Take your sunglasses off and stop acting like such a guido!"
The Jersey Shore.
Guido
Guidos today give the whole Italian culture a bad name. Gelled up blow outs, shirts extra small - bout the size my 8 year old niece would wear. Stupid sunglasses worn day and night. Usually all second generation Italians, and either don't speak of word of the language, or have learned just enough to enforce their guido image. Dark hair, waxed eyebrows, fake tans, lots of tacky jewlery. The modern day guido has usually never worked a day in their life (considered among guidos as an on going accomplishment) which leaves themselves babied by mama and papa. Thats right, no matter whos birthday it was for the BMW is still DADDY's bitch! Which brings up another point, Guidos drive BMW's Italians drive Cadillacs assholes. And even realer italians drive fiats and alfo romeos.
The guido doesnt care what his appearance really is, with a gut, skinny arms, a tight track suit and sandals he will still think he is the shit.
Every guido ive seen wears some form of womens facial make-up. Often when the guido does not have a desirable pigment to their eyes they will buy colored contacts.
The guido takes pictures of himself in poses that he wants to seem candid, often these pictures are numerous and the guido selects the 1 of 100 pics to put on his myspace page, which is littered with images of italian flags and the colors red white and green.
The common guido cannot tell you how old the Pope is, or who the leader of italy is. In fact, they probably dont even realize that when they call their father, they are saying the title "POPE" in Italian - (Pope = "papa" in italian, Dad/father = "papa" only pronounced with a sharp accent on the second P)
When guidos claim they beat someone up it is almost always a load of crap. Guidos are pussies. If they have beat someone up then they rallied up their 10-15 other guido friends and all jumped the kid. When guidos are alone they are pussies. I have beaten up 3 so far and will continue as i see fit. The 3 guidos ive beaten up, i have also humiliated them while they were crawling on the ground, messing up their hair, kicking them in the ass, and spitting on them.
Guidos are given there italian names at birth, often during childhood the guido resents this name because he does not fit in, often wanting to be referred to as pete instead of pasquale, or Fred instead of Alfredo, or Frank instead of Francesco. As the guido movement became more popular these same kids put use to their names, making themselves more italian.
My names Raffaele, ive been called Ralphie since forever. I never started correcting people and informing my birth name when i turned 16 you homos.
Real italians look down on the whole guido thing. Real Italians work hard and care about their families. Guidos dont work and hit up their parents for cash. This guido look, its all wigger shit.
Im 100% Italian but im not walking around like an asshole, Im Napolitan and Calabrese if you guidos know what that is, but way before that i'm an american, thats the flag i fly in front of my home, thats the country i live in.
Go take your crap to italy and see how you fit in.
"yo yo yo Mario!!! Whas good we hittin up dem clubs tonight?"
"Nahh yo, my dad took away my Bimma yo, he sayin i put too much mileage on it last week."
"Damn, i feel for you. You wanna hit up the italian club on 25th?"
"Nahh we got kicked out last time by dat guido "
"oh yah, aiight then, ill catch you on the flip side playboy"
"Ciao playa"
Guido
The Guido is an entirely American phenomena, with its epicenter in the New York/ New Jersey metropolitan area. Although most of its examples are of Italian-American descent, manytimes other non-descript Caucasians will follow suit in an attempt to achieve an identity- in fact any identity. The Guido is highly recognizable by his attention to muscular development, status symbols, and regional dialect. Guidos are fortunate in that they usually tend to be loyal to their heritage and cultures. However, their interpretation of the Italian culture is unique to Americans. They fall sorrily short when attempting to emulate the sophistication of European-born men. In fact, their shortcomings include a tendency toward alcoholism, legal problems (usually related to assault, reckless driving, noise violations), and an inability to compete in legimate business. Fortunately for them, they usually live an exciting, care-free existance. They are easily satiated by tacky mall attire, drunken nights with similar-minded women, and nightclubbing in the lesser desired beach towns such as Seaside Heights, New Jersey. In the end, although they maintain a unique sense of identity and pride, their superficial lives often leave them empty. The tolls of excessive grooming products, STDs, and alcohol abuse age these specimens quite poorly. The time spent in fitness clubs is usually far offset by their lifestyle choices.
"Although he spends all his time in the gym and dancing in the clubs, that Guido will soon be a burned out alcoholic working a thankless job, living alone in his one-bedroom apartment in North Jersey"