While "to wank" means "to masturbate", the term "wanker" is seldom if ever used in British slang to denote "one who wanks". It is quite wrong to infer from somebody's being a wanker that they in fact wank (and vice versa), but of course, fair to assume they do in any case. Herein lies the genius of the insult: if you call someone a wanker, it's probably true, but only literally.
I suppose it all originates from our repressed Victorian sexualities, from back when everybody thought they were the only ones to suffer the secret shame of being an actual wanker.
Most children these days learn the word "wanker" long before they learn its literal meaning.
(i) A marketingslogan which, rather than being created with skill or wit, simply implies that the product will will change your life for the better, - even if its just a packet of sweets
(ii) A marketing slogan which is just *too* cheesy
The following wankerisms were found using a google search on "marketing slogans".
Clothes to make you happy! (Nomads)
Creating more moments of pleasure. (Cadbury TreborBassett)
For a wonderful life. (Harvey Nichols)
Happiness is playing Bingo. (Super Bingo)
Happy starts inside. (Minute Maid)
Heaven can't wait. (Nestle Heaven)
Heaven needn't cost the earth. (Sandals)
Heavenly chocolate with a heart. (Divine)
Magic shoes for happy feet. (Starchild)
Make your body happy. (Aquafina Alive)
Make your break, a Delight. (Mars Delight)
One pound. One pan. One happy family. (Betty Crocker)
Pleasure. Every single Pringles Mini. (Pringles, Mini Pringles)
Pleasure. Perfected. (Braun Tassimo)
1. Someone excessively and annoyingly pretentious and/or false, with a strong likelihood of working in the creative industries, especially "new media". Very high populations of wankers are to be found in certain areas of London including Shoreditch and Hoxton; see also Shoreditch twat.
2. Someone with a faintly sociopathic lack of regard for other people; see also arsehole.
3. Someone useless, inefficient or time-wasting, especially in a place or work and/or position of responsibility.
4. A general term of abuse.
5. Someone who masturbates.
1. He spent twenty minutes telling me about the studio's new pathways they're developing in innovative synergistic blue-sky-media treatment concepts. In a fake Cockney-geezer accent. What a fucking wanker.
2. That cunt in the sports car just totally cut me up. What a fucking wanker.
3. He's being paid £25/hour and he just sits there playing Freecell whilst the rest of us do all his work for him, because he's the boss's mate. What a fucking wanker.
'one who masturbates their pork sword more than an ordinary person', 'a person who comes across as stuck up or smug'
EXAMPLE 1
Mum: 'Johnny you really should stop tossing off that tiny tree stump of a penis you have'
Johnny: (while wanking) 'what can I say Mum im just a wanker'
Mum: Indeed you are Johnny look at you go infact I might join you for a wank later then we can be wankers together. Goodbye wanker Johnny!
Example 2:
Yoda: Luke use the force
Luke: fuck off u midget green wanker
1) Someone who loves themselves so much that masturbation isn't enough self-love for them, so they publicise their imaginary greatness by appearing on reality TV shows, or failing that, add entries to definition websites describing people with their name as somehow better than everyone else. See also: narcissist.
2) Basically the same as 1) above but a narcissist who, having had their pride bruised by someone, decides it is a mature and reasonable course of action to define aforementioned person on a definition website with details of said infidelity plus various fabrications about their sexual and/or culinary desires. Someone who publicly blames their own inadequacies on someone else.
I was on Urban Dictionary last night voting on the latest definitions, and I couldn't believe how many wankers there were trying to big themselves up or put someone down.