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What is two seconds?
1. A measure of time.
2. More specifically, the amount of time it would take "Diesel Dan" to fuck up someone who has pissed him off.
3. This unit of time, being so quick, has yet to be calculated to an exact length. Still, researchers and witnesses to an event lasting one fucking two seconds have concluded that it is undoubtedly shorter than a New York minute, blink of an eye, two shakes of a lambs tail, and Superman in flight, which also by default makes it faster than a speeding bullet.
"Fuck that. I'll fuck him up in one fucking two seconds!"
two seconds - video
Two seconds - what is it?
When a guido approaches slowly in his tricked out Honda Civic, speeds up for the 2 seconds it takes to pass you in order to look sweet, then immediately slows down again.
Two Second Speed Up
What does "two seconds" mean?
The fact that anyone weaker than you wouldn't last two seconds in jersey.
Hey Billy whats wrong?", "My mom just passed away....".,"You wouldn't last Two Seconds In Jersey.
Two seconds - what does it mean?
Refers to something that is very thin.
Nancy's hair is two seconds thick.
Two seconds - meaning
the act one gives when wanting you to chill out either becuase you want to go or him to shut up when he is telling a gay story he wants to keep saying
ramzy, hury the fuck up lets go
two seconds bro
shut the fuck up and get in the car.
Two seconds - definition
The universally way of knowing that you're fucked. Popularized by celebrity chef Gordon Ramsay.
"Hey you, Two seconds please." - Chef Ramsay
Two seconds - slang
When a guy is receiving a hand job (usually a Light Bulb HJ) and he cums within roughly two seconds.
Man, I'm a Jewish girl named Steph, and I gave that guy a Light Bulb HJ last night, and he was definitely a Two Second Dave
Two seconds
Quickly, in a hurry, pronto, hasty, fast, etc.
Relax, just wait, I'll be at your house fucking two second style.
Two seconds
A crap that takes only a couple of seconds to take; shoots out like a rocket; comes out very smoothly... A SHIT THAT IS UNIQUE BECAUSE WHEN YOUR ASS IS WIPED, THERE IS NO SHIT ON THE TOILET PAPER; A COMPLETELY CLEAN SHIT.
"oh man, i only like taking a shit if its a two second slider- otherwise, i feel dirty when i wipe..."
Two seconds
The amount of time required to complete a task one has failed to complete, and is being scolded about.
Teacher: Why can't you write your name legibly on your tests? It only takes Two Seconds to write your name.
Boyfriend: Why can't you hurry up and finish? I'm sitting here banging it out, and you can't take Two Seconds to finish?