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What is skunkbear?A nasty and wholly unattractive member of the land weasel family (Mustelidae), sp. Gulo Gulo (Latin: "Glutton"), called by its common name the wolverine. It is also known colloqiually as "those assholes who think they go to an ivy-league school in the midwest." To skunkbear is known to reside inside coffee shops, trying desperately to look pretentious and educated, ensuring that other mammals in the vicinity see them doing coursework openly on a wireless laptop. Sometimes, solely for effect, the skunkbear will also carry a copy of Ayn Rand's "Atlas Shrugged"; this is to expand on the skinkbear's facade of academic elitism and snobbery, but with no actual equity behind it. The skunkbear's coat is usually dull, and poorly screenprinted with mock-retro logos or pseudo-political trappings. On occasion, however, the skunkbear will molt and reveal a second coat of maize and blue hue; this occurs twice per year, typically when the skunkbear encounters either Spartan warriors or a Buckeye. This change in the skunkbear's coat is a reaction to the threat of not being an attractive mate to species other than its own (in which the skunkbear, or anyone else, has no real sexual interest). If one encounters a skunkbear, one should not discuss the following topics under any circumstances: "See that guy in the University of Michigan hoodie? He's another skunkbear who only wears that shirt during rivalry week." skunkbear - meme gifskunkbear - video |
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