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What is Twilight?
A cliche, overrated, horrid series based on a wet dream of a woman named Stephanie Meyers. A 107 year old virgin vampire (he sparkles!) named Edward falls in love with a clumsy, unattractive girl named Bella, whom many believe to be autistic. He thinks she smells good and watches her sleep. Werewolves and mean vampires try to eat her because she smells just so delicious. But Edward won't eat her because he is a vegetarian! So instead he just randomly grabs her hand out of nowhere and takes a nice big whiff of it. Bella keeps almost dying as various vampires rape, track down, and videotape her. After three nauseatingly awful books, the last one finally comes out where Bella turns into a vampire, Edward gives her a C-section with his teeth, and they have a demon child the vampire mafia wants to destroy. They name in something equally retarded as 'Jasper' or 'Carlisle', some members of Edward's family.
There. I just saved you three weeks of your life you could never get back.
You're welcome.
"Twilight is gay."
"Edward's shiny diamond skin turns me on!"
"I can't live without my perverted old boyfriend."
"I'm danger, stay away."
"I want to eat you."
Twilight - meme gif
Twilight - video
Twilight - what is it?
A Young Adult Fiction book/series with vampire thrown in for the hell of it. Is commonly (and wrongly) mistaken for a fantasy book when it is clearly not. Many teenage and (sadly) child girls have become sucked into the fad that it Twilight and they have no idea what a real vampire is because the vampires in Twilight sparkle in the sun instead of burning and they do not have fangs.
Also, the main girl cannot think for herself
Fangirl: OMG!!!!! I LOOOOOOOOOVE TWILIGHT!!!! IT'S SO REALISTIC!!!!!!!! I WANT AN EDWARD!!!!!
Normal, non-obsessed girl/(more likeley)boy: Uhuh, riiiight
What does "Twilight" mean?
A series about vampires that is guarenteed to make you 25% dumber each time you read it.
Twilight raped my brain.
Twilight - what does it mean?
Simply put: the worst book ever to be published.
It's cliched, has no actual plot, sends out bad messages, is anti-feminist, has puple prose, etc etc.
It's fans are usually teeny bopper fan-girls who don't know the meaning of real literature, and who would kill you if you have a different oppinion. It's sad, really.
Twilight fangirl: Twilight fricken ROCKS, right? Edward's soooo hot!!!
Normal person: No! It reads like fan-fiction written by a 12 year old girl.
Twilight fangirl: *gasp* HOW DARE YOU?! *jumps up and down like a raving lunatic*
Normal person: *walks away*
Twilight - meaning
Oh that book twilight is shit.
Twilight - definition
A badly written book by Stephenie Meyer about a sparkling "vampire" *coughfairycough* named Gary-SueCullen who falls in love with a human, Mary-Sue Swan.
Gary-Sue is an abusive, 100 year old virgin stuck in the body of a 17 year old. Mary-Sue is a complete idiot who can't think or do things for herself. Gary-Sue loves Mary-Sue ONLY because of the way she smells. (Time of the mont, amirite?) Mary-Sue only loves Gary-Sue because he's "hot", cold to the touch and his skin is as hard as stone. (Statue fetish, anyone?)
Mary-Sue also falls in love with Pedo Bear the werewolf.
Gary-Sue promises he'll never leave Mary-Sue and that he'll always love her. Then he dumps her and Mary-sue flings herself off a cliff because she's so emo and can't live without her sparklepire boyfriend.
Later on Gary-Sue fucks Mary-Sue so hard it hurts her and gets Mary-Sue pregnant and rips the baby out of Mary-Sue's stomach with his teeth.
Because Pedo Bear could not score with Mary-Sue, he imprints on the infant vampire mutant... demon... thing, making her his future wife. In 7 or so years the baby has the body of an 18 year old and Pedo Bear is happy.
Twitard: Like, OMG! Twilight is so deep and well thought out and the plot is UHMAZING!! It's an UUUUHHHHHMAAAAZZZZIIINNNGGG BUUUUUUKKK!!!!!!!
Normal person: No, Twilight does not have a plot, the writing sucks and it's nothing more than a 35 year old's wet dream of underage fairies.
Twitard: EXCUSE ME? HOW DARE YOU! YOU'RE JUST JEALOUS YOU'RE NOT PRETTY LIKE BELLA AND YOU'LL NEVER HAVE ANYONE LOVE YOU AND YOU CAN BURN IN HELL, LESBIAN BITCH!
Twilight - slang
1.The time before sunrise and after the sun sets.
2. A book which people won't shut up about.
Almost every single girl I know won't stop reading the fucking thing.
1. It must be about twilight hour.
2. (Irrelevant example for twilight goes here.)
Twilight
A book that has garnered the affection of tweenies everywhere; it tells of the neurotic, paranoid relationship between two people. They are both jealous of their rivals and continually try to kill themselves to get out of their boring lives. Neither has much of a personality to speak of though they find one another fascinating, possibly because they have never before met anyone as boring and one dimensional as themselves.
an extract from Twilight:
"Edward, what about ROSALIE?!"
"She means nothing to me, but what about Mike?!"
"Ugh you have nothing to worry about! Please don't try to kill yourself again! I mean, I don't really like Italy, maybe if the Volturi could relocate to Paris?"
"Isabella. I feel as though you are not taking me seriously. Are you shagging Jacob on the side??"
Twilight
Twilight is the time between dawn and sunrise, and the time between sunset and dusk.
Twilight is one of the most beautiful times of the day for some people.
Twilight
A four-part book series about a girl's choice between beastiality and neophilia
Twilight....