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What is Costanza?
To get head while taking a dump, eating a sandwich, and watching TV.
- "What kind of sandwich would you like with your Costanza?" - "Pastrami with spicy mustard, please."
Costanza - meme gif
Costanza - video
Costanza - what is it?
To set out to accomplish a life task, only to fail miserably right off the bat. Usually done so in a humerously ironic manner that will make great campfire stories later on in life.
Examples of a Costanza would include, but are not limited to:
Spilling hot chocolate on the girl you've just met, thus giving her 3rd degree leg burns and forever friending you by default.
Falling into a gaping lawn hole while attempting to act suave whilst playing hot potato with various clothing items.
Attempting to engulf any sort of hot vegetable whole without the aid of silver ware, thus creating an awkward situation along with severe tongue injuries.
Sitting in a room, petting a dog's ass for 3 hours while your friends make moves on the girl you came there in the hopes of getting to know.
Being caught with dubious amounts of contraband by an insane lawyer, then proceeding to forge a night's worth of false documents in order to prove your innocence.
Chris: "So, you think that girl I met the other day will be there tonight? I really hope so, because she seems pretty cool."
Kyle: "Yeah man, just don't screw this up. Play it cool, you'll be fine."
10 Minutes after arriving to her house....
*Chris spills hot chocolate all over the girl's leg, and swallows a potato whole, then proceeds to pet the dog's ass the rest of the night out of shame and confusion*
Kyle, Mike, Chris: "COSTANZA!!!! CO-STANZA!!!"
What does "Costanza" mean?
Nibbling on a deserted dessert you've taken out of the trash can.
Dude, he's at the trash can, pulling a Costanza...I threw that donut away 20 minutes ago!
Costanza - what does it mean?
An act of defication that is so strenuous it involves the removal of an article of clothing, especially the shirt.
After Thanksgiving I usually have a Costanza.
Costanza - meaning
A flaccid penis. Short, fat and bald, not unlike the frugal and hilarious George Costanza of Seinfeld.
It's hard to have sex when you're Costanza.
Costanza - definition
One that is tight with money.
Dude, you're such a freakin Costanza.
Costanza - slang
A mysteriously beautiful woman. She is classy, collected, yet fun to be around. She has a gorgeous face and one of the most amazing bodies, causing every man's head to turn. However, the best part about her is her pure soul. She can have anyone she wants, but she is incredibly honest and committed to the one she chooses. Her word and actions always match and no matter what, she will always be there for you. She is confident and compassionate, the type of woman to put a smile on your face, the one you long to see and kiss at the end of the day. If you let her go, you will regret it until the day you die. Costanza is the type you want to marry.
Guy 1: Damn! Do you see that girl!?
Guy 2: She has the best ass I've ever seen!!
Guy 3: Yeah, that ass is fat, but what's better is her intellect. She's a Costanza!
Costanza
A person who seems Jewish but is really Italian.
dude: Is Lady Gaga jewish?
guy: Nah, she's italian and catholic but she is kind of a costanza now that I think about it.
Costanza
Front row parking. The closest, non-handicapped, parking spot to the location/ your destination.
"I couldn't believe we found a Costanza at the mall, as crowded as it was."
Costanza
a parking space especially close to the entrance, usually the closest or second closest space.
"Look at this parking spot! What a Costanza!"