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What is Christmas?
A celebration that happens every December. The Bible mentions no scripture about celebrating this day, nor does it even show the true date of Jesus Christ's birth.
A great chance for every stock market and major department stores to make the cash.
There's no scripture in the Bible that tells people to celebrate Christmas day, nor does it even mention the real date Jesus was born in.
Christmas - meme gif
Christmas - video
Christmas - what is it?
A holiday that originally was supposed to be for the birth of Christ, but after all these years, its just nothing but commercials, sales, and stress. What does a fat guy who hauls gifts down into your lifing room, and then flies away on a sleigh have to do with Jesus Christ? Jack squat.
Half the people who celebrate Christmas aren't even celebrating Jesus' birthday.
What does "Christmas" mean?
A holiday that was originally meant to celebrate the birth of Jesus Christ ,even though nobody really knows when he was born. Fortunately for kids, nobody really gives a shit about that part. In modern days, its all about adults bitching about much money they have to spend on their kids only to have the ungrateful little bastards bitch and moan about how they didn't get everything they wanted. Also a day that somehow went from celebrating the birth of Christ to a day celebrating a fat guy in a red suit that breaks into peoples houses and leaves presents under a tree that for some reason is indoors decorated with all kinds of cheap crap. Talk about selling out. Jesus would not be happy :(
Christmas is by far the greatest marketing scheme of all time. The commercials usually start mid November, completely ignoring Thanksgiving, and thanks to all the propoganda, it insures that all the stores can raise their prices only to say that it's a super limited Christmas "bargain." All in all, Christmas is a great holiday, so fuck it, Merry Friggin Christmas to all and to all a good night. Just remember that National Hangover Day is right around the corner
Christmas - what does it mean?
People say Christmas is all about Presents, Santa Clause or this one guy named Jesus? Well you see those are all fake. We all know that Christmas is all about one thing and that is......
A swiss colony beef log.
Stockings are hung on the chimney
And the presents are under the tree
And Mamma's in the kitchen
Making some, 'erbal tea
The windows are covered with frost
And the candles are all alight
But as I wander, through this quiet house
Something just doesn't seem right
You see, every year, the neighbours bring us
A Swiss Colony Beef Log
But the neighbours aren't around, around, around
There's no Beef Log to be found this year
No Beef Log
Christmas isn't Christmas
Without a Swiss Colony Beef Log
Without those cheeses and meats
I don't think I can get around
My mother tries to comfort me
She says "Here Son, have some egg nog"
I fucking hate egg nog, seriously
What do I see?
Underneath the tree?
Grandma got a Swiss Colony Beef Log just for me
Ah... Gravy!
Swiss Colony Beef Log, baby!
That's what Christmas is all about!
The roly-poly Colony Beef Log, baby!
Makes a little boy scream and shout!
Deck the halls with balls of Swiss Colony
La la la la la, la la, la la!
Sweet
Christmas - meaning
Christmas is a fun holiday. On Christmas people get presents and who doesn’t like presents. It is also a time to spend time with family and friends.
Santa: Ho ho ho! Merry Christmas
Lucy: Did you Bring presents for us?
Santa: Of course I did
Lucy: Yay! Can we open the presents now?
Rosie: And we can spend time with family and friends
Christmas - definition
A widely celebrated end-of-the-year profit scam.
Ah, Christmas... the time to total your credit cards in complete disregard of Jesus Christ's birthday.
Christmas - slang
The celebration of the birth of commercialism... Oh yea, and Jesus.
I'm gonna set up traps to kill Santa.
Christmas
A collection of tradition's from all sorts of European pagan holidays around the time of the Winter Solstice. It used to be a violent party, but somehow became a family holiday. The Church hated Christmas, until they realised that they could "convert" it to Christianity. They claimed that Jesus was born on this day and badaboom badabing, ba-humbug. Now it's alright, I suppose.
Child: Yay! It's Christmas! What did you get me daddy?
Man: Your not my son. I'll fucking buy you something when you earn it, you bastard.
Christmas
A wonderful time when somebody breaks into your house and eats your cookies, whilst replacing the food with presents. <3
"Look! It's Christmas! I wonder if the happy chubby dude left me any presents!!"
Christmas
A time when an obese, chubby, and hairy man with a body mass index of 'obesity category III' (before cookies) uses the illegal tactic of breaking and entering to raid your home, steal your cookies, and then leave presents that you will most likely be anticipating for the whole night.
Is literally invisible when you try to catch him in the act. Nothing will work. (Or course, unless, you use thermonuclear bombs.)
"How was your Christmas?"
"A bald obese guy broke into my home and stole my cookies."
"That's nice. What did you get?"
"Coal."